


Forgetting to Breathe

by ZhenLe



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Character Death, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-06
Updated: 2014-01-06
Packaged: 2018-01-07 16:14:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1121915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZhenLe/pseuds/ZhenLe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haruka decides to find out what made Makoto forget to breathe three years ago.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forgetting to Breathe

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I wrote this. Forgive me.

It was 12 minutes to midnight.

The stars shone in the night sky. The sea breeze was gentle. It was dark, silent, cold.

Haruka, dressed entirely in black, stood a little away from where the waves met the shore. He gazed out into the open sea, the rough currents in the water, the dark ripples on its surface.

12 minutes to the third anniversary.

12 minutes away to remember that person.

That one person, who had forgotten to breathe.

X-X-X-X-X

It had been a dark silent night when Haruka’s cell phone rang. The number of the dialler was a familiar one; the Tachibana’s house phone.

One the other end was a soft gentle voice, one that Haruka recognised immediately. It was Mrs Tachibana, calling him at such an unearthly hour.

Her voice was full of darkness, full of anxiety, full of fear. Haruka wondered why, until he heard what she had to say.

_Is Makoto with you?_

It wasn’t long before the raven was running out of the house, running along the pathway where he and his best friend had always travelled to and from school. He called, called loudly for the brunet, called his name in vain. There was never any reply.

It wasn’t long either, till the police and an investigation team ordered a search for the missing boy. The night was still young, and the moon shone brightly in the sky. The ocean waves crashed violently against the shore.

It was a long time until he was found. The sun was beginning to peak out from behind the curtain of darkness by the time he was recovered. The ocean had returned his body. Cold, limp, and lifeless.

Makoto’s body was found. But his spirit was gone.

~

The hospital room was stifling. Background noise drove Haruka crazy. The smell of antiseptic and alcohol was too strong. The place reeked of death.

All Haruka remembered that day were the doctor’s final words.

_He’s stopped breathing._

Makoto was gone.

X-X-X-X-X

Haruka spent two whole years of his life pondering one single question.

_What made Makoto forget to breathe?_

He kept to himself, he was even more cold than before. He was silent, invisible, as good as not being there.

He had mourned, for days on end, for the loss of the one person who had been his entire world. It was as if his life had lost its meaning. He was a living ghost.

Because Makoto was gone.

Haruka had never gotten over the mourning stage. But a new emotion had crept into his body soon after. Anger. Red, hot, fiery anger.

_What did the ocean have that made Makoto forget to breathe? What was so intriguing that had caused him to venture into its depths? What did the ocean have that everything else did not?_

It never made sense to Haruka, as to why they had found Makoto’s body in the ocean. His best friend had always been afraid of it. He had never wanted to go near it ever since the day he was traumatised. So why did he go in? Did he find something in there that he never wanted to let go of?

~

Ever since that day, Haruka had given up all dreams of swimming in the ocean. He never wore his swim trunks underneath his clothes. He never tried to strip in front of any body of water.

It was all out of rage for the one thing that had taken away a precious life. A life that had been the meaning to Haruka’s own life.

Two death anniversaries had passed, and Haruka still did not have the answer.

X-X-X-X-X

Tonight, Haruka walked silently by the shore. He awaited the day that would mark Makoto’s third death anniversary.

He checked his watch again.

Five minutes till midnight.

Haruka slowly unbuttoned his shirt, and slipped out of his clothes.

Tonight was the first night in three years that he had worn his swim trunks. They still fit him perfectly, yet Haruka was itching to get out of them as quickly as possible.

Tonight was the night he would find out what made Makoto forget to breathe.

His watched ticked slowly by. It was as if time had slowed itself, teasing him relentlessly.

Haruka felt that he would burst with rage, if not for the clock hands ticking to 12 at last.

Finally. It was midnight. Three years ago, Makoto had forgotten to breathe.

And tonight, Haruka would find out why.

He stepped slowly into the ocean, its cold water stinging at his ankles and calves, as if forcing him away. Haruka persisted, going deeper and deeper into its vast depths until his chest was completely submerged.

Inhaling deeply, he closed his eyes and plunged into the dark waters. Tonight was the night where he would see for himself, what exactly had caused Makoto to forget to breathe.

Slowly, Haruka opened his eyes and his legs kicked rhythmically, forcing him deeper and further into the ocean’s depths.

It was silent down here, dark and silent. Almost comforting. There were no distractions, no mocking, no teasing, nothing. There was no stress, no fear, no anxiety.

Maybe that was what made Makoto go further.

So Haruka delved deeper into the silence, letting the water envelop his entire being. He surged forward, looking for the reason as to why Makoto had chosen this place as his final destination.

And why he had forgotten to breathe.

A smile formed on Haruka’s lips. He suddenly felt at ease with the water again as he had so long ago. He felt comforted knowing that Makoto had been right here where he was. Maybe Makoto had finally found the peace and solace Haruka used to find in water.

_Did Makoto fall in love with this place? Did Makoto want to stay here forever? I wish I had gone with Makoto; it would have been more amazing together._

That night was the night Haruka once again realised how tranquil the depths of the ocean were.

That night was also the night that Haruka forgot to breathe.


End file.
